I dont know whether I should keep on writting or not. This is my passion and I do love to express myself here.. But I'm so scared if my writting makes other people feel uncomfortable. Should I stop writting and stop everything that I like?? Where should I go? To whom should I express this kinda feeling that only can be express by words? I dont know. Maybe I'm not belong to this world. I cannot make anything for myself. Everything that I do is wrong.. I'm so sad. Maybe I should think about myself sometimes. Maybe 2% at least? Am I destined to live with a miserable life? like this? getting hurt and not appreciated with people surround me?
I fall, i crawl and here I am back on my feet again. Still, there's no changes in my life.. Giving 200% seems like I'm giving only 10% of my effort.. I dont know what come over me, I feel like I'm so damn useless and I'm not deserve to be happy.. I'm always think that I'm a actress in a movies.. I believe that someday I will be happy, and I'm end up to live with something that I can lived with.. I know, all I need to do is to be patient. Cos I know everytime I'm getting hurt I am so much closer to my aims, which is to gain a better way of living.
Hate me,curse me and hurt me, go ahead I just dont care anymore. I know what is the best for me, I'm giving my best for me.. If other people seems to have a problem with it.. Fine with me, I wont mad, cos I know whats the best about me. Maybe the person is not the one for me. Thats why they cannot even see me thru..
I wont turn back this time, cos all I've got is nothing. It just make me more miserable. You cannot love me, fine with me. You cannot understand me, I will understand. I will not beg for someone to appreciate me or love me.. It comes naturally. All I have to do is learn to let things go..
1 comment:
i don't think i am in a place to judge,but u know,maybe it all become like that because it's all what you ever think about? try look back at your blog~ huhuhu..
hey babe,yes i know ,love is like a life to you, if it's broken,your life will shattered along with it..
maybe rite now,u're still not standing up,maybe u still crawling,but it's~!
when u said u r not being appreciated,it will goes to other people around u,u know? i always do my best to appreciate u because i dnt want u,my friend,to see this world like a cruel world to live on..
*macam biase,sorry for d loooong comment! *
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